16 October, 2009

Banquet Homestyle Grilled Meat Patty Meal

Our old friend, the Banquet Meat Patty, is back - this time without the smothering cheese sauce - in Banquet's NEW! Homestyle Grilled Meat Patty Meal.

Aside from the way in which seemingly off-the-shelf ingredients have been combined, there doesn't seem to be many "new" things about this meal. The "meat patty," now freed of the gluey vomitous cheese sauce, tastes pretty much like the standard Banquet "mystery meat" fare - a vaguely oniony-seasoned, oversalted combination of beef, perhaps some pork, and certainly some textured vegetable protein - is practically identical to their "salisbury steak" patty. The sporty grill lines are new, though. I wonder how ConAgra gets them there? Screen printing? Minimum-wage factory worker with a paintbrush and a bucket of Caramel Coloring? The thick, tough, chew-resistant noodles are definitely familiar: I'll never forget them from the Swedish Meatball challenge from several weeks ago. And, of course, there's the Beef Bouillon-flavored gravy in which all of it swims. That's so standard that Banquet probably converges a dozen different manufacturing lines under a huge gravy nozzle for a big splurt before sealing. All of which is to say that although the meal is a triumphant symphony of mediocrity, it's not entirely bad.

At any rate, the absence of the cheese sauce actuallly makes this particular meal a few notches better than its smothered cousin, and for a dollar or so, the Homestyle Grilled Meat Patty Meal will certainly satisfy your lunchtime hunger without grossing you out.

1 comment:

Eating The Road said...

I always wonder how they get away with calling it Grilled...it should at least be "Grilled" in quotes.

I don't think you're far off my saying they're painted on. I remember seeing a Food Network show on it and they didn't show that exact process but the patties went through a machine and 2 seconds later...grilled!